I had a dream last night that I was out in our front yard getting ready to place our plastic light-up St. Joseph statue (the kind that is part of a Christmas nativity scene...) in the flowerbed near the front steps. Just as I placed him on the ground some water washed up from nowhere into the raised bed and knocked him over. I picked him up and wiped him dry and looked around to realize that the water was ankle deep.
So I carried St. Joseph to the front porch to keep him out of the water. From there I could see the water rising and I was worried that he would be lost or ruined. I didn't want to go into the house though -- I was afraid St. Joseph and I would be trapped inside when the water got too high. Instead I raised him high above my head and began wading through the now knee-deep water and out of our yard.
I don't know why exactly but I was sure that something dreadful would happen to St. Joseph if he even so much as touched the water - and all I knew is that I had to keep him dry.
The two of us went down the street but at this point the neighborhood had morphed into some other place as often happens in crazy dreams. Now we were in the parking lot of a large apartment complex and knocking on doors - frantically trying to find someone to let us in and out of the rising water. I could see people looking through their windows at us. The looks on their faces seemed to say something like, "Who's this lunatic outside in the rain with a plastic St. Joseph statue?" (Hmm.. Now looking at it from a more wakeful state I suppose I can understand why no one would open the door afterall.) After several dozen desperate knocks I finally found a door that was slightly open. The water had already entered the apartment and was sloshing against the walls. The refrigerator had fallen over in the kitchen for absolutely no reason. The water certainly wasn't high enough to have knocked the refrigerator over - but this was my dream and if my mind wanted the refrigerator knocked over then it could do it. I found it quite fortunate, as a matter of fact.. because suddenly (very very suddenly) the water was just over waist-deep and I was having trouble keeping St. Joseph's electrical cord from trailing in the water... And without the overturned refrigerator I would have had nothing to climb on to start breaking a hole in the ceiling.
I looked around to find a way to break the ceiling but there was nothing available.. cabinets, a refrigerator... and St. Joseph. Poor St. Joseph. I used St. Joseph to bash a medium-sized hole in the ceiling and then proceeded to shove him through it. I kept thinking to myself that I was going to scratch his paint shoving him through the little hole... Nevermind what damage was done by bashing the ceiling with the poor saint -- I didn't want to scratch the paint. With St. Joseph secure in the upstairs apartment I managed to heave myself up after him with an ease only possible in my dreams.
The water followed so quickly that I didn't have time to congratulate either of us. I kicked out the apartment window and dragged a mattress off the bed. I carefully laid St. Joseph on his mattress and waded out behind it as it floated through the window. The water was wild and it was difficult keeping St. Joseph from sliding off the mattress into the water... I struggled constantly to hang on to the mattress and kick-swim in all directions trying to balance him there. Finally I pushed the mattress into a more shallow area of water where I could stand again and I slung St. Joseph over my back using his electrical cord. We trudged through mud and debris onto some semi-dry land. Our respite was temporary. I could see the water still rising in our direction and I knew I had to keep my companion out of the water at all costs. I spotted a high branch in a nearby tree and started swinging St. Joe by his electrical cord to gain the momentum for launching him up to safety.
I must have tried all night... But each time to my horror he would bounce back down the tree limbs and I would scramble to catch him before he landed in the dreaded water. All the while I worried at what the rough tree limbs must be doing to his paint...
The water was high enough under the trees to force me to return to my former position of arms up - St. Joseph over my head - and wading. The water just kept coming and coming and coming. I closed my eyes and tried to think of a place where we could go...
And it hit me -- my house has a second floor! Of course! How had I forgotten that before?? We would wade/swim back to my house and he would be safe there. I then worked swimming between floating piles of debris -- placing St. Joseph on top of the piles as we went to keep him dry. It wasn't the most efficient means of rescue -- but somehow his cord never trailed in the water.
When we reached my house the water had already reached the roof. So much for the second floor. I swam to the peak of the house with St. Joseph balanced carefully between my shoulder blades and there I realized that I could not fight the water anymore.. It would keep coming and coming and I would lose the fight. I closed my eyes again - but more tightly this time.. and wondered what it would feel like to drown. I clung to St. Joseph - I had let him down.
But just then it occured to me - for the first time in our ordeal.... St. Joseph can float!!!
And then I woke up.
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